Oct. 22, 2009 - The longest day ever!

Thursday October 22 was the big day. The day I was very much looking forward to, but also fearing at the same time.
Wednesday night we went to bed knowing the weather would be awful Thursday morning. We had to drive to Galveston and be in the waiting room at 7:45. We got up to crashing thunder and many weather alerts on the morning news. We thought we had a good plan and had plenty of time to make it to the hospital on time.
We were W-R-O-N-G!
We left with 45 minutes to get there. Not much traffic, but lots of heavy rain! I mean pouring down, windshield wipers going as fast as they could, and we still couldn't see much type of rain! I don't do well driving (or riding for that matter) in the rain. I would cancel any appointment to avoid the stress (well, except this one!!) We hit a torrential down-pour that caused the water to pond on the freeway and the traffic slowed to a crawl at 30 mph. GREAT! We were going to be a little late, but not to bad! Then Ron announced he was starving and we were going to stop by Shipley's Donuts! I had my bowl of plain cheerios at home before we left and haven't had the luxury of eating a donut in several weeks. And I knew not to have to much sugar before this ultrasound. We didn't want the baby bouncing off of the walls! The line at Shipley's was long! GREAT, we were going to be a little bit later!
We left Shipley's and headed for the hospital. Now, Ron knows Galveston pretty well. I asked if the road we were to use to get to the parking garage ever flooded. "I'm not sure." We hadn't run into any major street flooding, so I thought we had nothing to worry about!
W-R-O-N-G A-G-A-I-N!!!!
We came down off of the elevated bridge and saw some water on the road. No big deal. We would stay in the left lane. Then the left lane had a few inches on water. Then we found ourselves in quite a mess. The middle of the road was OK, but there was no escaping. We would have to keep going and hope & pray it didn't get deeper. We passed a flooded out car & this was when I pretty much lost it! I was terrified! We were in my small car and I wasn't sure how much water it could handle! Ron watched the tires on the car in front of us to make sure we could make it. It was still POURING down raining. Finally, the road started to reappear and it looked like we were heading toward higher ground! Thank God! It was truly terrifying.
We made it into the parking garage and the real stress of the day hit me. We were here. It was time. I hadn't had any time to even prepare myself for what was to come.
We made it to the right place and were so relieved to find that the Genetics Counseling was now in the exact same place as the ultrasound lab. HUGE relief!! Last time we walked back and forth across the UTMB campus 3 times between the genetics and ultrasound. It was a very,very long walk and we got lost several times along the way. We checked in with the registration clerk and were told that most of the doctors were running very late because of the weather. No kidding, we were already about 30 minutes late. So we took our seat in the waiting room and watched the rain outside & some CNN news.
About 20 minutes later Dr. Lockhart (the head of the Genetics department) & two interns were at the door calling our name. Dr. Lockhart is about 80 years old and the sweetest lady you could ever meet! She's smart, direct and to the point! We sat down and she congratulated us and told us she remembered us from last time, she had gone through our history to refresh her memory. She was very happy to see the NT scan had come back with perfect results, but still wanted us to know we had the option of an amnio. We updated our family tree (we have two new little nephews that have or will joined our family recently or soon! We went over the general genetic defect that are most common and then we were asked for a decision about the amnio again. We decided until we have a reason to think something is wrong, we would not do it. If the ultrasound in a few short hours showed us anything questionable, we would schedule it ASAP. Dr. Lockhart thought this was a great idea. So after about 20 minutes, we were finished with the Genetic Counseling.
One down, one to go. Whew!
We went back to the waiting room and waited for Carol (the sonographer who performed our NT scan) to arrive. She was is major traffic and flooding. We didn't mind. I wanted to have Carol do this ultrasound. I really like her and we had taken off the entire morning, so we were in no rush. Plus, who knew if it was still horrible and flooded outside! We were in no rush.
Carol arrived and apologized for being late! Everyone was late, including us, so no apologies needed! We would have waited another hour for her!! We made our way to the same ultrasound room as the NT scan. I was so nervous! I told Carol and reminded her this was when everything went so horribly wrong last time. She reassured us that this time was different and everything was going to be fine. Did I mention I really like this woman! We told her that we DID want to know the sex, but only after we knew everything was OK. She said, "not a problem, I completely understand."
She turned off the lights and we started. First thing was the heart. She talked us through the entire process and pointed out everything she was looking at and measuring. She would tell us that's a good measurement every time. We saw everything. Heart, lungs, umbilical cord, liver, spine, kidneys, brain (no hydrocephalus at all), feet, hands, lips, eyes. We were both in total awe watching the baby wiggle around. We had no idea how long this would be or when the end (when she would tell us the gender) would come. It seemed to last forever, but also fly by all at once!

I think the profile picture is so cute!
Then she said...."Congratulations, this is definitely a little boy!" as she finally showed us "the goods" on the screen!!

I'll never forget that moment! Ron was so happy he looked like he was ready to jump up, give Carol a high-five and do a Tiger Woods fist pump!!!! It was pretty hilarious!! I know he was secretly hoping for a boy, but he was pretty sure it was going to be a girl! We were both so excited & emotional. I had a few tears ( OK more than a few) in my eyes and Ron reached over and grabbed my hand and squeezed it so hard it hurt! He had the biggest smile on his face that I have ever seen! Then she told us he was a BIG boy! He is measuring 10 days ahead and weighs in at a healthy 12 ounces!

I can't explain the feeling of everything going well this time. I am always prepared for the worst at every appointment. We left the hospital with a list of people to call and share our news with. We didn't! I just wanted to spend some time with just us knowing. We planned on going to grab something to eat, but it was only 10:30 and our restaurant wasn't open yet for lunch. I was starving!! We drove down the Galveston seawall thinking of things we could do to pass some time until lunch. We decided on a trip to Walmart! We stopped and got some gas since we were already running very, very low from sitting in traffic/flood on the way to the hospital. I couldn't stop looking at the ultrasound pictures. While the gas was pumping, Ron tapped on the window and said "it's a boy" again. I died laughing and said "I know, I'm looking right at it!" He is so excited and thrilled to have a son on the way. And I am too.

It looks like this handsome little man already has his daddy's cute pug nose!

We made it to Walmart and found some prenatal vitamins & just wandered around killing some time. Then after two years we finally felt comfortable taking a stroll through the baby section and looking at all of the stuff. We purchased our first item. A diaper bag! It's the exact colors I want to decorate the nursery in, so I went ahead and bought it! Ron said the colors aren't his style and jokingly picked out a Spider Man back-pack he will buy for himself to use as a diaper bag!
We went back across the Island and made it to our favorite restaurant "The Original" for some awesome mexican food & lots of talk about our boy. Our Son - that still sounds so awkward.
I'll never forget this day. It was better than I could ever have imagined. The reality that we might actually have a baby this time hit us and it became more of a reality. I know this got very, very long so thank you to anyone who made it this far. This is more for me than anyone else. I want to chronicle all of this and remember it, so I can hopefully share it with our little boy one day. How much we went through to get him here and how much he was loved before we ever met him.
Oh, he already has a name......
though it is still very strange to actually say it or write it.....
.
.
.
.

Daniel Kaden Gogle

(Ron's first name is Daniel and we really love the name Kaden or Kade for short). And Ron thinks "Kade Gogle" sounds like a really cool baseball players name!

Great day with a great outcome.......but we will still pray every single day for his safe arrival. Until I hear his screaming & crying, I'm not convinced that everything will actually be OK & he will come home with us.

Things that make me smile :)

Jillian had this great idea to write out the "Reasons I'm smiling Today" and I thought I would go ahead and participate. I have been feeling a little bit down the past several days. I don't know why. I should be very, very happy and excited and relieved after all of the stress from last week. Now it seems there is just another long list of things to stress & worry about. We're half way there (20 weeks today) and we haven't even began to prepare a single thing. But that's another post for another day!

So, Reasons I'm Smiling Today.....

1. My mom finally got approved for social security and can now retire and shut down her business. I am so happy for her. We went out for a day of shopping last Saturday and she said she was excited to sell her home office desk and equipment and buy two cribs & set up a nursery in her former office!!! She has 2 grand babies on the way! Free babysitting ~ SCORE!!!

2. Seeing my project that I have been working on relentlessly for months go through the bidding process fairly smoothly. It was a tough project. Three minor mistakes on a project estimated to cost around 1.2 million and had 24,000 square feet of space to renovate ain't to bad! Now we start the construction process!

3. Seeing Ron's plumbing business finally starting to pick up again. It has been a slow two months and it was starting to get kinda tough to make end meet.

4. The cool, fall weather is finally here!! BIG, HUGE SMILE about that!! I am soooo over summer!

5. Knowing that, as for now, this little one is doing well and growing ahead of schedule. Feeling the kicks and rolls are a feeling I just can't even begin to describe. Just to know the basic building blocks of life are there makes me smile & nearly cry all at the same time. I can now say for sure I get kicked just about every time I get in the car... this baby either loves or hates car rides!!

6. Halloween is so much fun! I love seeing funny costumes in random places! As my sweet friend Jen wrote on facebook earlier today..."I just saw Elvis driving a smart car"... I have a perfect visual of that and just about died laughing!! It just makes for a fun, different day and that makes me smile!

7. IT'S FRIDAY!!! And Ron is NOT going to his hunting lease this weekend!

I have another post ready to go ...And yes, I know the gender of this little one. The next post will be about the BIG DAY and I figured I would save "the reveal" for that post. If your on Facebook...you already know!! I'm going to do my best to not go home and fall asleep on the sofa and actually finish that post by adding some pictures....and maybe a belly picture!! We'll see, I know a few here don't even know what I look like! I don't follow blogs where people are to concerned about revealing themselves, yet here I am doing the very thing that makes me nervous about "incognito bloggers". The "April Rose" hoax still just burns me up!

So, stay tuned, there just might be two post in one day here on the Gogleville blog! GASP!!!!

Thank you Jillian, I do feel better now! May I suggest everyone go to your blog and write out the Reasons I'm Smiling Today!! :)

October 21

I'm back-tracking a little bit to get caught up.
I WILL BE A BETTER BLOGGER ONE DAY!

Regular doctors visit was pretty uneventful. We waited and did the usual weight, blood pressure and urine sample. No big deal! Other than the scale is no longer my friend. I have gained a total of 20 pounds so far into this pregnancy. Not Good! I was terrified to even see my doctor or say anything about it.

We got to the exam room and talked to the nurse about some additional screening test we could have done as a follow up to the NT Scan. We decided to go ahead and do it. We've done every other scan/test/screening up to this point, so why not. Dr. G came in and asked how everything was going and how great our results were from the NT Scan. I was measured (I''m right on track belly size-wise). I had never been measured in my pregnancy with Emma, so it was nice to feel somewhat normal. We were able to hear the heartbeat for a quick second before the baby threw a big kick and rolled over. I was happy to just hear it and know at least this baby was alive (it's a terrible recurring nightmare I have had many times, I know it happens).

I asked about my weight and Dr. G nearly fell out of her chair! I desperately pleaded my case that.....
1. I had been starving for the last two weeks, but my appetite had fallen off a little bit in the last several days.
2. I had quit smoking the month before we got pregnant. I'm sure some of this weight is from quitting.
3. I do eat healthy most of the time. I rarely eat fast food.
4. Maybe the baby just had a big growth spurt.

I don't think she believed me & I am now on the "write it down" diet. I write down every, single thing I eat. NOT FUN! But it is working a bit to slow down my weight gain. I only gained 1 pound this week - yeah! I am no longer allowed to eat Little Ceasar's Cheesy Bread or any donut of any kind! Isn't pregnancy the only time your not supposed to really care about weight gain?

I decided to go ahead and get my regular flu shot. I haven't had a shot in........I don't even remember!! So, after talking all kinds of smack to Ron about what a big baby he was about shots, I started to wimp out myself! I used my sisters "self-torture method" and pinched my arm really hard right below where she was giving me the shot and I barely felt it! I loved seeing Ron squirm in his seat while I got a shot!! Big, tough man - yeah right! Then it was to the blood lab for another blood draw for the follow-up screening. I use to be terrified of blood-draws. I hated them, but now......not so much. No big deal! Ron won't even walk into the room! Next month I will have my reserved H1N1 - swine flu vaccine.

We went to make another appointment for next month and were reminded of our BIG appointment the following day at the hospital. Believe me.....we remember & wouldn't miss it for anything! We left with my left arm absolutely throbbing from the shot and blood draw. We headed home and both of us went off to work for the day. Sometimes these appointments seems so pointless. But, I will not miss a single one!

We were both to bed early and ready for the BIG day of the anatomy scan. To say I didn't sleep well would be an understatement.

Living with Deja Vu

Today, October 15, is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.
I'm remembering.
Maybe to much.
Being pregnant again doesn't erase the memories or magically make it all better.
I still miss her.
I'm sure I always will.
So many others who have lost their precious little ones, I'm thinking of you tonight.

Some instances of Deja Vu are just not fun.

I'm nearing the point where everything went horribly wrong last time. Everyday is a struggle to stay positive and think the same thing could never happen again. Tomorrow I will be at the 18 week mark. I distinctly remember sitting on the table (18 weeks along) awaiting the gender reveal and asking the sonographer exactly how far along I was. "So, 18 weeks is 4-1/2 months right?" That sounded sooo good to me! But, I was never able to say that to anyone after that day. I did have to say, "I was 4-1/2 months pregnant, but not anymore" many, many times.

I want to say I think I may feel this little one kicking & rolling around to protest my "not so great breakfast choices" this last week. I wish I could just be excited about it and not filled with worry & the thoughts of "don't fall for it, do not get to attached....yet", but it is what it is. Next week will be tough & I'm sure filled with lots of anxiety.

I've decided to have the sonographer write down the "boy or girl" news in an envelope and we'll open it after we leave the hospital. We will not get wrapped up in the "gender ultrasound." I know very well that is not what the anatomy scan is all about. I couldn't take the "it's a girl......but...wait.....I'm sorry...I see some problems....I need to go get the specialist" nightmare again. I can't put into words how hard that was. To get so excited and then have our dreams crushed within moments. I think the envelope idea is a good plan to keep us focused on what is important, a healthy baby.

14 weeks

I'm a little late posting this, but I finally got our printer/scanner connected and working again. This was the U/S picture of "Baby Googie" from our 14 week appointment (2 weeks ago...yes, I'm that behind. We are actually 16 weeks and 3 days today). I thought I would have to beg for an ultrasound & thoroughly plead my case, but the substitute doctor we saw walked in with the u/s machine!! Score! Everything seems to be on track and our baby now has a big pot-belly just like me!! Our next appointment is Oct. 22 for the anatomy scan and gender reveal!! We're soooo excited, but very, very nervous. We're just praying for everything to go great and nothing at all like the last time. I know I will be a complete mess that day, but it's expected and our special sonographer is already aware & informed of our history. We're just hoping & praying for a great day on Oct. 22.

I'm a bad blogger!

I'll admit it, I'm a bad blogger!!!

Life has been kicking my ass lately. I have so much to write but no time. Work is unbelievable right now. Busy, busy, busy!!! Today is the first day in over 2 weeks I have had time to actually respond to an email or post on my other blogger friends blogs. I'm a bad blogger and a bad blog friend.

Let's see.....I have a huge list of excuses!!

1. Work is killing me, but I finally got the very large project off of my desk today!!! WoooHooooo!!!!
2. The fun little lawsuit threat I spoke of several months ago is still hanging over my head. Clock is ticking!!
3. Computer had a close call with death.....it recovered.....then died a slow & painful death.
4. Had to buy a new computer.
5. Had to re-buy quickbooks and reinstall quickbooks for Ron's company. It took 3 days!!!!
6. Have to find a new AutoCAD program to be able to work from home & on above mentioned lawsuit. Think this may finally be solved!!!
7. We went on vacation.

I still haven't reinstalled my camera transfer software to my new computer, so writing a post about Frio without pictures would be NO fun! I took some pretty neat pictures and worked a little bit on my photography, but not nearly as much as I wanted to. I will do a Frio post very soon!

We had another appointment last week and things still look good. This little on seems to be growing at a great pace. We're still waiting for the big ultrasound on October 22. I think after that day I will feel much better & maybe a little more secure. Maybe start working on the front room. I still don't want to jinx anything. Everyone knows already...I'm expanding rapidly!

We celebrated my 30 Birthday Saturday. I'm 30 years old! My sisters keep reminding me by saying, "I talked to "so-and-so" the other day and told then you were going to be 30 and they couldn't believe it"!!! THANKS SIS!!! Ron told me he made a reservation at one of my favorite restaurants "The Olive Garden" and it would just be us. Great...Ron does not like Olive Garden and I NEVER get to eat there. So I was excited. We got there at 7:00 and told the receptionist we had a reservation at 7:00. "I'm sorry sir, we don't take reservations on the weekend, but we have a table open." She proceeded to take us to a table. Ron looked completely dazed and kept looking around as we walked to our table. As soon as we sat down he said, "I have to go to the bathroom" and took off. I KNEW something was up. He came back and said our table was actually on the other side of the restaurant. We walked over and my mom, sister and our great friends Stephen & Jen were all waiting for us. Ron tried so hard to pull it off & the restaurant screwed it up!!! But it really makes for a funny story!! His face was just priceless when we sat down at the wrong table!! We all ate some great Italian food and I watch many drink lots of wine! My best friend Jen made me my favorite cake...almond cake! (BTW - The Frio post will have "The Great Tale of the Crazy Frio Cake Lady & the Almond Cake".) It was a really great birthday.

So there is a quick update just so I don't get so far behind that I simply don't want to blog anymore. I'm going to be better this month....I promise. And my most sincere apologies to my blogging friends for being M.I.A for most of the month.

1 year anniversary of Hurricane Ike

A year ago today we were spending the night without power & sleeping in the hallway while Hurricane Ike slammed the upper Texas Gulf Coast. This was the first big storm Ron & I stayed through. I didn't sleep much at all, Ron slept like a log!! I will never forget the sound of the wind slamming against our garage doors or the stench of lumber the evening after the storm hit or how silent everything is when there is no power, only the constant hum of generators. I didn't get many great pics, but here are a few.

The coastguard helicopter made countless trips over our house to Bolivar. We found out later many people were caught off guard by the rising water on the only evacuation route out of Bolivar.

Our neighborhood after the storm.

Buses coming in to help evacuate people out of Galveston.

On our way out to the Frio River to get the heck out of the mess, San Antonio had TX DOT signs warning to not travel to Houston or Beaumont. I was stunned to see these signs.

Galveston has made quite a com back since September 13, 2008. It is still sad to see the long lasting damage & some are saying it will take a decade to fully recover. Ron locked his keys is his van the week after the storm while working on the island. I had no plans of going down there that soon and found myself in tears looking at all of the damage. It really looked like a bomb had gone off. Many tree have salt water contamination and will have to be cut down. Broadway will never look the same.

Galveston will recover.....always has and always will!!!

And a full update on life and our trip to the Frio coming very, very soon!!!